I used to be a pretty calm person. I would giggle at the naughtiness of my friends children as being cute even impish if you will. I seem to have lost that sense of wonder and joy at such impish behavior.
Why? Because my children are now the imps in question.
My darling husband is the good time dad. It's like a scene out of Leave it to Beaver when he comes home from work. "Daddy!" they cry in unison cheerfully. When I come home it's like the drill instructor has come to punish the troops. Don't get me wrong, I get the "Hiya mommy" and courtesy hug, but I have become the bad cop ALL the time. Daddy saves the kids from evil mommy {at least that's how I see it in my head} and I'm sick of it. SICK of it. Hear me good time weekend daddy that lives with us full time?
So, I've decided to steal his thunder by making the effort today to be the good time mommy. It was hard--he let them climb on the chair and swing the pictures on the wall willy and nilly, spin on the table like it was a 1980's break dancing contest. It was utter chaos. I'm sure if you ask him he would say it was controlled chaos, but I digress.
I will tell you after a day of being good time dad with no bad cop to reign them in he was totally exhausted. He actually wondered aloud, "Why were the kids so amped up today?" I am proud to say that I didn't shout out while raising my hand frantically in the air, " I know, I know. Call on me. Is it because you gave the kids apple pie for breakfast? Handed out sugary snacks throughout the day?" Instead, I merely shrugged my shoulders and said, " I dunno, it's anyone's guess."
I think I might implode.
I don't know why I feel like I have to have things in order. Maybe the inner mommy in me is slowly taking over the free loving spirit I once embraced wholeheartedly. Perhaps, it's the fear that others will judge me and my parenting skills by my children's wild behavior. Is this typical of mommyhood? Do husbands usually get it or will they wonder what the heck happened during the teenage years completely dumbfounded?
I know one day I will miss all of this, but right now while in the thick of it I admit it, I cry uncle because being a mommy, a full time working mommy in the trenches is hard.
Dearest Mommy,
ReplyDeleteI am from the old days when Daddy was the guy that went to work before we got up and came home at dinner time and expected dinner to be on the table even though Mommy had 2 CRAZY KIDS under 6 and NO HELP. I will tell you that my Mom didn't abuse us but when we needed a good CRACK IN THE HEAD she smacked us a good one on the butt and let us know we better not cross the line or else Daddy would take care of us. I'm not sure what Daddy was going to do but my Mom made it sound so bad that we just shaped up PRONTO. Daddy was NOT to be messed with. That's how it was in the "OLD DAYS." Neither my brother nor I seeks counseling to this day. We are both successful and living on our own. Neither of us is in or has ever been in prison or has any felonies. I think we are both better for our upbringing and I'm sure that neither of us would change it for the world, in fact we would give ANYTHING to go back for even one day. Be hard on your kids, expect a lot and they will live up to your expectations. Don't be afraid of them, RULE THEM, they will thank you later on. I know I did. Don't cry uncle, they depend on you for everything. YOU ARE THE BOSS. Be loving but firm. Think, "What would my Mom do ?" Your Mom raised 3 GREAT KIDS, follow her lead. Ilove you and know you are a GREAT Mommy, don't doubt yourself. You have wonderful kids who are testing the limits now, be strong they will grow out of this and be better.
You will only be the "GOOD TIME" Mommy when you quit that pesky job ! HELLO JUNE CLEVER ! ! Wake up with your damn pearls and party dress on and NEVER be the least bit cross (cross, who the hell says that ? ! ? ! I'm so 1950's) Wally and the Bev will be just fine, don't worry,well perhaps you should worry about the one that will be the BEV. Ya know, just saying. ;O
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